(PRINTS) Lone

14 in x 11in, printed on water resistant 50lbs paper and protected with crystal clear sealed poly plastic.

When I started constructing this piece I sparingly had a moment to myself. I would center and come back down to my reality only to be abruptly approached. This was not in inclusiveness, not always. I found myself making the choice to be surrounded by company I know did not favor me or to embrace my space. More often than not, I chose to be among others for the sake of my constant need for socialization and also to be with those few individuals I did love. That was at a cost: the expense being my time and productivity. While I hated this logic I had to juggle more often then not my selfishness prevails and I am alone again. Misunderstood yet again. Somehow, I always feel it’s my fault for not setting early boundaries, or not honoring my own time earlier. The skull represents this back and forth thinking and time passing, continuing while I seem to always become trapped in singular thoughts. The potter wasps, represent the discomfort of these moments. While I am suffering almost, the wasps which are the people around me would happily make a home out of the vacant skull, no matter where we find ourselves: not all those people care about your well being. The solitary garter snake represents the intentions, while it lay in wait to catch a wasp or a swallowtail it doesn’t present itself as an obvious predator. A single swallowtail butterfly represents the mental and astral way I project myself from these situations. This coping mechanism is a double edged sword, while on one had I can separate myself from the situation at hand I become emotionally unavailable and more often then not fail to support any relationship I create. I now know why my mother always said “I don’t mind a few snakes in the garden”. More often than not you’ll find yourself in company of people who don’t regard you anymore then you regard others. It’s an inside looking out issue, a balancing act.